A couple of quick updates on the Hooray for Earth-chartered bus for the Wellfleet Beachcomber show with Rocketscience this Friday:
1) The original Stop and Shop in Allston pickup spot has proven to be unviable due to lack of late-night parking, so there will be a new pickup spot announced soon. It will still be in Allston.
2) The bus is too much. It's a magic bus. I want it, I want it, I want it... caaaaaaaan't have it!
In other news, my general financial brokitude continues. The good news is that I put myself on a uber-strict budget to stop the bleeding and it seems to be working out okay. This weekend, I spent a grand total of $6 and still managed to meet my gluttonous eating and excessive drinking quotas for the week.
What's my secret? The key is that I have developed an almost Joe Welsh-ian ability to take advantage of free stuff. Don't get me wrong - he is and always will be the master of the mooch. But I'm doing my best. My sister-in-law's sister (would that make her my sister-in-law-in-law or my sister-in-sister-in-law?) had a great birthday party this weekend during which I never wandered more than 3 feet in any direction from the keg or the rib platter. It's like I had a mooch tether attached to my ass.
When you're in a band, there are many little techniques to cut costs. For instance, fellow band members will rarely question their bass player when he says, "The club only gave us one drink ticket each, the jerks." And by the time the other band members find out the truth of his clever rouse, their bass player has already finished consuming the band's allotment of free adult beverages and is lovably drunk. He's simply adorable when he's loaded and quite frankly, they can't stay mad at him.
Birthdays, weddings and anniversaries can present sticky situations for someone with no cash flow whatsoever, but it's nothing a little imagination can't overcome. For instance, for the recent Scamper 5th anniversary dinner, I made coupons for each of my fellow band members. Mike gets one free hug while Nate gets a complimentary backrub. I saved the best of all for Keith: one time during the next calendar year, Keith gets to punch me in the stomach as hard as he wants. As long as he warns me - that's how Houdini died.
I guess what I'm saying is it takes a lot of hard work to be a cheap bastard. It's a complete lifestyle change. Anyone have any other cheap-ass stories/ideas for mooching to help a brutha out?
1) The original Stop and Shop in Allston pickup spot has proven to be unviable due to lack of late-night parking, so there will be a new pickup spot announced soon. It will still be in Allston.
2) The bus is too much. It's a magic bus. I want it, I want it, I want it... caaaaaaaan't have it!
In other news, my general financial brokitude continues. The good news is that I put myself on a uber-strict budget to stop the bleeding and it seems to be working out okay. This weekend, I spent a grand total of $6 and still managed to meet my gluttonous eating and excessive drinking quotas for the week.
What's my secret? The key is that I have developed an almost Joe Welsh-ian ability to take advantage of free stuff. Don't get me wrong - he is and always will be the master of the mooch. But I'm doing my best. My sister-in-law's sister (would that make her my sister-in-law-in-law or my sister-in-sister-in-law?) had a great birthday party this weekend during which I never wandered more than 3 feet in any direction from the keg or the rib platter. It's like I had a mooch tether attached to my ass.
When you're in a band, there are many little techniques to cut costs. For instance, fellow band members will rarely question their bass player when he says, "The club only gave us one drink ticket each, the jerks." And by the time the other band members find out the truth of his clever rouse, their bass player has already finished consuming the band's allotment of free adult beverages and is lovably drunk. He's simply adorable when he's loaded and quite frankly, they can't stay mad at him.
Birthdays, weddings and anniversaries can present sticky situations for someone with no cash flow whatsoever, but it's nothing a little imagination can't overcome. For instance, for the recent Scamper 5th anniversary dinner, I made coupons for each of my fellow band members. Mike gets one free hug while Nate gets a complimentary backrub. I saved the best of all for Keith: one time during the next calendar year, Keith gets to punch me in the stomach as hard as he wants. As long as he warns me - that's how Houdini died.
I guess what I'm saying is it takes a lot of hard work to be a cheap bastard. It's a complete lifestyle change. Anyone have any other cheap-ass stories/ideas for mooching to help a brutha out?
12 Comments:
Three words:
Art Gallery Openings. I went to college in Santa Fe, and there were gallery openings, with complimentary wine and cheese, every weekend. I think I spent 10 dollars of my own money on booze in my entire 3.5 years there.
I should have guessed that the best mooching advice would come from a stand-up comic.
I'm also thinking of trying to expand my typical "birthday week" in August to a "birthday month." So basically, if you don't buy me a birthday drink in the month of August, you're a jerk.
Have you tried becoming a REALLY attractive, REALLY thin and REALLY blond woman and hanging out at bars on Newbury Street? I understand that works.
Have you tried becoming a REALLY attractive, REALLY thin and REALLY blond woman and hanging out at bars on Newbury Street? I understand that works.
I did try that one weekend. I didn't have the commitment to go all the way, though.
Have you tried becoming a REALLY attractive, REALLY thin and REALLY blond woman and hanging out at bars on Newbury Street? I understand that works.
This does not get you free drinks. It gets you uninvited package grinding against your ass.
When have I ever mooched a god damn thing?
er...um...maybe once or twice
"This does not get you free drinks. It gets you uninvited package grinding against your ass."
True, but that package has a double-waterfront estate in Edgartown, and as we all know, Brendan LOVES the Vineyard...
This does not get you free drinks. It gets you uninvited package grinding against your ass.
This isn't the first complaint I've heard from a woman about bar package-grinding. This is apparently way more common than I knew.
A couple tips:
Places like BJ's or supermarkets do those sample carts at the end of the aisles - hit every one of them - don't buy a thing.
If you go to a wedding and it's open bar, make sure you drink more than the cost of your gift.
Or, in the case of Hogg's wedding, sing for their first dance and tell them that that WAS their gift.
It's genius.
Make friends with someone that works at Bruegger's. At the end of the day, they get to take home day-old bagels. I survived an entire summer off of bagels.
I also looked anorexic.
www.barfrog.com
Every weekend there are free drinks or really cheap drink specials at specific bars. You get the fun of going out and being social..but not the cost...
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