While I didn't watch much of the MTV Video Music Awards, I did manage to catch the replay of Britney "Anna Nicole" Spears "Smith" zombie-walking her way through a big production number wearing nothing but a glittery bra and panties set and a glazed-over look in her eyes.
Usually with Britney, it can be a sort of fun game to play "Guess the Pharmaceutical Combo" based on which particular poor motor skills and erratic behavior she happens to be displaying that day. But this time, I was surprised to find myself feeling vaguely sad and a little creeped out witnessing this poor used-up real doll trying to recapture her formerly energetic sex symbol image.
The whole pathetic scene sort of reminded me of that episode of The Sopranos when Tony visits the woman who had an affair with his father that claimed she fucked JFK. When Britney was grabbing that male dancer's crotch, she might as well have been putting on a wig and singing "Happy Birthday, Mr. President." Yuck.
As for the rest of the show, I tuned out. I'm still boycotting until they ask Arsenio to host again.
Usually with Britney, it can be a sort of fun game to play "Guess the Pharmaceutical Combo" based on which particular poor motor skills and erratic behavior she happens to be displaying that day. But this time, I was surprised to find myself feeling vaguely sad and a little creeped out witnessing this poor used-up real doll trying to recapture her formerly energetic sex symbol image.
The whole pathetic scene sort of reminded me of that episode of The Sopranos when Tony visits the woman who had an affair with his father that claimed she fucked JFK. When Britney was grabbing that male dancer's crotch, she might as well have been putting on a wig and singing "Happy Birthday, Mr. President." Yuck.
As for the rest of the show, I tuned out. I'm still boycotting until they ask Arsenio to host again.
8 Comments:
I hear Stacy furiously typing a response.
I hear Stacy furiously typing a response.
Duder.
I love Brit Brit.
I think she wanted nothing to do with this performance and did it because her "people" set it up and it was too big to get out of without looking like a bitch.
I'm all about Team Britney. I think she's taken a terrible downfall and needs some serious help with a dash of direction, but once given that she'll be back on top.
"Gimme More" is my hot jam bustin' out on my ipod right now and I'm really excited to hear the new album.
"Toxic", "Overprotected", "Stonger", "Born To Make You Happy", "(You Drive Me) Crazy" and the 'makes me cry almost every spin' ballad "Everytime" will never allow me to let her go. I just can't do it.
Britney 4 lyfe, bitches!
On a totally unrelated note, why isn't anyone talking about the kid that probably died trying to catch that Markakis HR yesterday?
why isn't anyone talking about the kid that probably died trying to catch that Markakis HR yesterday?
Because you're yammering like a lunatic?
Regardless of whether Britney WANTED to be there or not, she was. I don't care if her managers made her do it, and she's had a hard time lately, and if she heard about Sarah Silverman's joke about her kids just before she went on... all the more reason to fucking rock it and prove everybody wrong! She should've known that it would kill what's left of people's faith in her if she didn't put her heart into it but she didn't even care. She didn't even try to be good. I love Brit, too, but she was totally unprofessional and it was sad.
The best part was the look on 50 Cent's face in the crowd, like he was realizing for the first time that he probably would not want to bang her. Probably.
Working title for her Biography:
The Briney Spears Story: Virgin Mouseketeer to Stretchmarked Trainwreck.
Working title for her Biography:
The Briney Spears Story: Virgin Mouseketeer to Stretchmarked Trainwreck.
I know it wasn't intentional, but the idea that her first name is misspelled on her own biography makes it that much funnier.
Especially since she's "briny," like she's a sea captain or something.
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