You know what pisses me off? The fact that I know who Perez Hilton is.
In general, I try to spend as little time as possible learning about celebrities in their everyday lives. I find no pleasure in watching Entertainment Tonight, Extra, or really anything E! network except for programs featuring the very funny Joel McHale and the delicious Chelsea Handler. It's just a personal taste thing - I have many very intelligent friends (mostly women and Joe Welsh) who read Us Weekly and watch celebrity gossip shows, viewing the whole thing as harmless distraction. I can't say I really "get it," but then again a lot of people don't get my 20-year infatuation with roided-up supermen in tights hitting each other with steel chairs and then going crazy and murdering their wives and seven-year old sons. To each her own.
And while I find the whole celebrity culture mostly boring, I don't get resent the celebrities themselves. I mean, it's not Jessica Alba's fault that someone in power decided to make her the "Really Famous Girl of the Moment" and stick her on every magazine cover and television show until I'm sick of fucking looking at her. Sure, given the choice I would be completely unaffected by the marketing of stupid people about whom I'm supposed to care. But really, I would have to be pretty g'darn curmudgeonly to resent the fact that I know who Jessica Alba is.
But here's who I shouldn't know: Perez Hilton. This is a person who's entire existence is commenting on famous people. And now he's famous. And, despite all my efforts to block vacuous douchebags like him out of my life, he's now officially famous enough for me to recognize him. Granted, I'm not entirely sure what he "does," but I'm going to take a shot in the dark and guess it's NOTHING! He has not earned my attention in one single tangible way. And yet there he is, causing a few of my precious brain neurons to fire in recognition of his chubby blue-haired useless face.
Am I the only one that gets absolutely batguana insane about this shit?
In general, I try to spend as little time as possible learning about celebrities in their everyday lives. I find no pleasure in watching Entertainment Tonight, Extra, or really anything E! network except for programs featuring the very funny Joel McHale and the delicious Chelsea Handler. It's just a personal taste thing - I have many very intelligent friends (mostly women and Joe Welsh) who read Us Weekly and watch celebrity gossip shows, viewing the whole thing as harmless distraction. I can't say I really "get it," but then again a lot of people don't get my 20-year infatuation with roided-up supermen in tights hitting each other with steel chairs and then going crazy and murdering their wives and seven-year old sons. To each her own.
And while I find the whole celebrity culture mostly boring, I don't get resent the celebrities themselves. I mean, it's not Jessica Alba's fault that someone in power decided to make her the "Really Famous Girl of the Moment" and stick her on every magazine cover and television show until I'm sick of fucking looking at her. Sure, given the choice I would be completely unaffected by the marketing of stupid people about whom I'm supposed to care. But really, I would have to be pretty g'darn curmudgeonly to resent the fact that I know who Jessica Alba is.
But here's who I shouldn't know: Perez Hilton. This is a person who's entire existence is commenting on famous people. And now he's famous. And, despite all my efforts to block vacuous douchebags like him out of my life, he's now officially famous enough for me to recognize him. Granted, I'm not entirely sure what he "does," but I'm going to take a shot in the dark and guess it's NOTHING! He has not earned my attention in one single tangible way. And yet there he is, causing a few of my precious brain neurons to fire in recognition of his chubby blue-haired useless face.
Am I the only one that gets absolutely batguana insane about this shit?
9 Comments:
I don't hate Perez but his ubiquity on TV is not working for me. There's a certain place for flamboyant gay guys on TV but Perez is missing a certain "something." He seems really awkward on TV. Also, I hate when his own blog becomes a catalog of his media appearances. Booooorring!
I hate to be a dick (really, I do), but the only time you could have seen that fat confection of a man on TV was while you were watching E!, MTV, or VH1. A bit like complaining about contracting herpes, isn't it?
I hate to be a dick (really, I do), but the only time you could have seen that fat confection of a man on TV was while you were watching E!, MTV, or VH1. A bit like complaining about contracting herpes, isn't it?
Well, if there's a show with Sebastian Bach rapping on it - what am I supposed to NOT watch that show? Do I have no blood in my veins?
And I would TOTALLY complain about contracting herpes. Why wouldn't I?
SCAMPER is an acronym for active verbs to change your problem
You posting on mescaline again, Pedro?
Sorry - I've been doing research on where the band got its name. Basically trying to debunk my own theory that you're named after my childhood neighbor's cat.
Sorry - I've been doing research on where the band got its name.
Brian Daubach. Look it up.
Brian Daubach. Look it up.
A true American hero.
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