For those of you that didn't read the paper or see the skywriting, Keith's and Alena's little boy Jason celebrated his third birthday last week. As his Uncle Boogie, I only have his best interests at heart. I felt that it was time for him to know about Spider-Man.

As I headed to the toy aisle looking for a cool but appropriately durable Spider-Man action figure, I encountered perhaps the most exciting news to happen in my world since Mike Mirabella's herpes test came back negative. Spider-Man and Mr. Potato Head have officially joined forces to become... Spider Spud:

What's more, it says right there on the box: "With Peter Parker Parts!" I love alliteration on toy boxes!

This marriage of two toy classics is the most scintillating development in crossover since I ordered that special William "The Refrigerator" Perry GI Joe figure. They didn't have them in stores. You had to call a number and get a code and mail in six cardboard coupons. (For the record, I believe the code was "STI" as in "Special Training Instructor" which was apparently the Fridge's job in the GI Joeniverse. Why an elite government fighting force would hire a 400 lb. sack of crap to physically train them is beyond me. And yes, I remembered the code without looking it up on the internet).

Upon further research, Mr. Potato Head has also joined forces with the Star Wars franchise to create Darth Tater and Transformers to give us Optimash Prime. (Which Madden owns, by the way. And he's not 3. He's in his mid- 30's.)

It's a brave new world, my friends. What I wouldn't give to be 8 again.