The following is an instant messenger conversation I had last night with an Unidentified Perverted Friend (UPF) who was apparently surfing internet porn whilst chatting with me, a creepy visual I am still trying to scrub from my memory cortex:

UPF: Man, I hate voyeur amateur porn.
Me: Oh, don't say that. Not after all it's given you.
UPF: This guy posts pictures of his fat, gross wife and writes "Check out my hot sexy wife on vacation last year." While I'll have to take his word on the "vacation" part, the "hot" and "sexy" claim is flat out wrong. The guy needs his glasses prescription upped.
Me: Imagine the part you had issue with was the vacation piece?
UPF: Ha!
Me: "You call that a vacation? That looks like a 'weekend getaway' at BEST!"
UPF: "Apparently, you and I have very different ideas of what constitutes a vacation. I say good day, sir!"

Have a nice long holiday weekend and try to check out the Baker CD release show at TT the Bear's tonight. Go Sox and blah blah blah.