The scene: It's 4:23AM. Brendan is in bed sleeping, as is his custom. Suddenly, he is awoken by the sound of screaming. It's coming from inside his mouth.
Tooth: WAKE UUUUUUUUUUUUP!
Brendan: Wha...? What's happening?
Tooth: Wake the fuck up, bitch!
Brendan: But why? It's four in the morning.
Tooth: Yeah, I figured now would be the best time to discuss a few things.
Brendan: Like what?
Tooth: Good question. Well mostly, I just want to take this opportunity to tell you I hate you and you suck. Oh, and also I'm going to make sure you never sleep through the night again.
Brendan: Come on. Can't you let me get back to sleep? We can talk about these issues in the morning?
Tooth: Actually, you should have handled "these issues" last year when the dentist told you to get me pulled. But you didn't, did you?
Brendan: I've been busy.
Tooth: And I've been rotting to the nerve. Hope you've enjoyed the football season, though. That Randy Moss is something, huh? Oh, by the way, DON'T GO TO SLEEP! LA LA LA LA LA!
Brendan: Come on, man. I've got my debut show with my new band at the Bulfinch Yacht Club tomorrow night. Cut me some slack.
Tooth: You're playing with the Rationales, right?
Brendan: Yeah.
Tooth: I hear they're very good. Left upper incisor really loves their stuff.
Ibuprofen: Sorry I'm late.
Brendan: What the fuck took you so long? I called for you like 20 minutes ago.
Ibuprofen: I was listening to the roughs of the new Rationales record. I love their rootsy brand of rock and roll.
Brendan: Yeah yeah, they're terrific. About this tooth...
Ibuprofen: If I come to the show tonight, will there be parking or should I take the T?
Brendan: I'm not sure of the parking situation. There's no game at the Garden, but there is a WWE Smackdown taping.
Ibuprofen: Oh, I should probably go to that. Those guys are always asking for me. Although not as much as my big brothers Vicodin and Percocet.
Tooth: Those are your brothers? I hate those guys!
Ibuprofen: Thank you very much. They do good work.
Brendan: Could we please let me get some sleep? I'm dying here.
Ibuprofen: Sure, no problem. (Faggot.)
Tooth: You can't kill me. You can only quiet me for the moment. I'll be back tomorrow night when you try to hit those high notes.
Ibuprofen: Don't worry - I'll be there.
Lots of booze: Me too, bitches! WHOOOOO!
Brendan: Yaay!
Tooth: I'll get you for this Midleeeeeeeeeeeer....
Tooth: WAKE UUUUUUUUUUUUP!
Brendan: Wha...? What's happening?
Tooth: Wake the fuck up, bitch!
Brendan: But why? It's four in the morning.
Tooth: Yeah, I figured now would be the best time to discuss a few things.
Brendan: Like what?
Tooth: Good question. Well mostly, I just want to take this opportunity to tell you I hate you and you suck. Oh, and also I'm going to make sure you never sleep through the night again.
Brendan: Come on. Can't you let me get back to sleep? We can talk about these issues in the morning?
Tooth: Actually, you should have handled "these issues" last year when the dentist told you to get me pulled. But you didn't, did you?
Brendan: I've been busy.
Tooth: And I've been rotting to the nerve. Hope you've enjoyed the football season, though. That Randy Moss is something, huh? Oh, by the way, DON'T GO TO SLEEP! LA LA LA LA LA!
Brendan: Come on, man. I've got my debut show with my new band at the Bulfinch Yacht Club tomorrow night. Cut me some slack.
Tooth: You're playing with the Rationales, right?
Brendan: Yeah.
Tooth: I hear they're very good. Left upper incisor really loves their stuff.
Ibuprofen: Sorry I'm late.
Brendan: What the fuck took you so long? I called for you like 20 minutes ago.
Ibuprofen: I was listening to the roughs of the new Rationales record. I love their rootsy brand of rock and roll.
Brendan: Yeah yeah, they're terrific. About this tooth...
Ibuprofen: If I come to the show tonight, will there be parking or should I take the T?
Brendan: I'm not sure of the parking situation. There's no game at the Garden, but there is a WWE Smackdown taping.
Ibuprofen: Oh, I should probably go to that. Those guys are always asking for me. Although not as much as my big brothers Vicodin and Percocet.
Tooth: Those are your brothers? I hate those guys!
Ibuprofen: Thank you very much. They do good work.
Brendan: Could we please let me get some sleep? I'm dying here.
Ibuprofen: Sure, no problem. (Faggot.)
Tooth: You can't kill me. You can only quiet me for the moment. I'll be back tomorrow night when you try to hit those high notes.
Ibuprofen: Don't worry - I'll be there.
Lots of booze: Me too, bitches! WHOOOOO!
Brendan: Yaay!
Tooth: I'll get you for this Midleeeeeeeeeeeer....
3 Comments:
Ooooooh I get it! "Cutting the ties" Clever.
that's a Hall of Famer, Brendo Boogie. I should introduce your whining tooth to half my damn mouth.
I second the HoF motion, and also pass a motion to get that conversation you had with your bank account in the HoF as well.
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