I'm going to skip the pleasantries and jump right into this story here. Because I've got a few thoughts.
Thought #1: Those fucking Chargers are meanies. How dare they hurt my Tommer?
Thought #2: Which option do you think will draw more attention from gawkers and paparazzi - a 6 foot 2 male model-looking quarterback loping around town or a 6 foot 2 male model-looking quarterback loping around town with a suspicious hoodie and sunglasses on?
Seriously, that is the most conspicuous-looking "disguise" in history. He might as well be tooling about Manhattan sporting that "I'm #1" cap from that Saturday Night Live fake commercial with Will Ferrell. Of course in Brady's case, he wouldn't be wearing it ironically. He has as good a case as anyone on the planet of actually being "#1."
Thought #3: You're Tom Brady. You're poised to win your fourth Super Bowl after going undefeated and breaking the touchdown record. Plus, you're the most handsome guy in the universe. After all those accomplishments, you STILL have to bring your girlfriend flowers? Shouldn't just showing up and being Tom Brady be enough?
It's never enough with you bitches, is it?
Thought #1: Those fucking Chargers are meanies. How dare they hurt my Tommer?
Thought #2: Which option do you think will draw more attention from gawkers and paparazzi - a 6 foot 2 male model-looking quarterback loping around town or a 6 foot 2 male model-looking quarterback loping around town with a suspicious hoodie and sunglasses on?
Seriously, that is the most conspicuous-looking "disguise" in history. He might as well be tooling about Manhattan sporting that "I'm #1" cap from that Saturday Night Live fake commercial with Will Ferrell. Of course in Brady's case, he wouldn't be wearing it ironically. He has as good a case as anyone on the planet of actually being "#1."
Thought #3: You're Tom Brady. You're poised to win your fourth Super Bowl after going undefeated and breaking the touchdown record. Plus, you're the most handsome guy in the universe. After all those accomplishments, you STILL have to bring your girlfriend flowers? Shouldn't just showing up and being Tom Brady be enough?
It's never enough with you bitches, is it?
5 Comments:
Shouldn't just showing up and being Tom Brady be enough?
Throwing in a "I'm Tom Brady, bitch(es)!" couldn't hurt either.
How many other women in the world do you think Brady would be still bringing flowers to at this point? Any?
How many other women in the world do you think Brady would be still bringing flowers to at this point? Any?
See, I'm surprised he even cares at all. I mean, she's a model. It's not like she's likely to be good in the sack or something. They're all ribs and elbows, those ones.
I do not find him the slightest bit attractive--at all. I never have.
This just further proves the fact that you're gay.
I'm 6 foot 4, I worked real hard at that so please get it right.
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