I know it's coming down to the wire to get your March Madness bracket picks in, so I've got your money-winner for you: go with Ball State. It's funny because it's a college with the word "ball" in it.

What? Ball State isn't even in the tournament this year? Okay, I guess you could always go with the "pick the teams that were good when I was in junior high and actually watched college basketball" technique. That leaves us with Villanova, Georgetown, and Syracuse.

What? Ronnie Seikaly doesn't play for Syracuse anymore? And Patrick Ewing's SON plays for Georgetown? Christ, I'm getting really old, aren't I?

Eh, I'd say just forget it. I'd say your best bet is to not play the brackets at all this year. Instead, you should take that five dollars and buy me a beer at O'Brien's this Saturday night to soothe my old creaky bones.

Or you could just copy the bracket of the office receptionist's twelve-year old son. They always win it anyway. Either way, come to our show on Saturday. As usual, we'll drink our failure away.